June 6, 2010

This has been a very hard week for me and my energies have been totally consumed by family-related issues.  The ‘crisis’ is still ongoing so there’s not going to be a new posting this week.  I have retained the posting from last week though – and am repeating it here for another week – because it’s about our blog community and today, even more than when I first wrote the posting, I need this community to do what community does best; help us through the hard times.  So please read on (if you haven’t read it already) and please please do respond with a comment introducing yourself (if you haven’t done that already).  It would mean a lot to me right now to hear from lots more of you.  Thanks.

Syl —————————————————————————————————-

Hi

If you’re reading this then you’re one of the people I’m writing to.  First a little story and then back to the letter.

I have just experienced an incredible few days of music.  It began on Thursday when I went to see an opera film at Gio’s Ristorante.  I think I might have mentioned it before; it’s a southern Italian restaurant that once a month – on the last Thursday of each month – has an opera/dinner ‘event’ that involves sitting at a communal table, watching a fabulous opera film – this week it was Il Trovatore … a beautiful Verdi opera, and being brought course after course of Italian deliciousness – and the meal lasts right to the end of the opera.  There’s wine too of course.  So that was an evening absolutely immersed in the music and the food.

Friday was an unusual day for me.  Almost all Fridays that I’m in Toronto and not travelling we have dinner with my mother and Ellen.  Because the Common Thread Chorus’ big annual concert was on Saturday we had a dress rehearsal starting at 5 on Friday.  I went early to see if there was anything I could help with, and I had to deliver 7 dozen biscotti I’d baked for the bake sale at intermissions as well as 2 cherry cakes and 1 big banana cake my mother had baked for us.  Turned out they were ahead of schedule and didn’t need any help so I went off to have an iced coffee with one of the tenors.  That was really the first time I’d sat down and talked to him and it was nice.

I left the dress rehearsal a little early because we had tickets to a Carole King/James Taylor concert … with their old band brought back together for the event.  It was incredible and I’ll tell you all about it in another posting, I promise.  What a night!!  Here’s a clip of the two of them in a 1971 concert and they sang the same song last night and sounded the same too.  They just didn’t look quite the same … but then do any of us look the way we did in 1971?

Saturday morning David and I got up fairly early, went out for breakfast, and then bought the fresh fruit I was bringing for the choir’s green room all day.   We performed two full concerts – at 1:30 and 7:30.  Thanks to those of you who were able to – and chose to – come; I hope you enjoyed the concert as much as I enjoyed singing.  That’s  me on the right hand side wearing a crocheted scarf – 2nd row, 2nd from the right (the person to the right of me – as you look at the photo – is another Sylvia believe it or not).  It was a very hot day and the old church we were singing in wasn’t air conditioned so by the end of the 2nd concert I was pretty tired … and exhilirated too because it went really well I think.  David came to the afternoon concert with my mother and cousin Pearl and then he stayed on when they left so he could be a volunteer usher for the evening performance.  After the performance we were all invited to go out for a celebratory drink together.

I know that happened after some regular practices and other smaller concerts but I’d never gone.  Family would be at the concerts – which is so so wonderful – and I’d leave with them.  This time it worked out well for me to go out with the other choristers and so we did.  I’m going to return to the choir next year, even though it’s a lot more work than I’d thought it would be.  But here at the end of my first year in the choir I really wasn’t feeling like part of a choir community.  I guess it’s natural that the singers who’ve been there longer have become closer but with the collapse of the usual buddy-system this year it was really pretty hard, at least in my experience, to get “into” the community of singers.  And then sitting on that patio last night waiting for drinks to come and talking I realized that I didn’t feel like part of the Common Thread community because all I did was come to choir practices/concerts but I never took the time to get to know anybody else or let them get to know me.  So how could I feel like part of the community?  Last night – and indeed spending all day together yesterday (from 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. when the 2nd concert ended at the  least) – was the beginning of joining the community and not just being in the choir.

Community.  What is it?  In ecological terms – which are the most natural ones I think – it’s defined as “a group of interdependent organisms inhabiting the same region and interacting with each other.”  Patch Adams said that “we can never get a re-creation of community and heal our society without giving our citizens a sense of belonging.”  Two things there:  we need to have a sense of belonging in order to heal, and we need communities that give us a sense of belonging.  Community has always been of central importance to me.  I guess the first community we belong to is our family and, as we all know, that is what it is and sometimes it gives you a full sense of belonging to a community and sometimes not so much.  My best memories of living “in community” are fro1975 – 1978 when I lived in London, Ontario with a group of kindred young grad students who shared my love of Jewish observance, dancing, singing, learning, family, and outdoor adventure.  We had Friday night dinners at each others’ homes, we had a shabbat afternoon party at Dr. Block’s every week, I got together with Lilly Block and some other women once a week to study Torah, we had mikva-partners, and there were baseball games, trips to Stratford to see plays, camping trips, and so much more.  We all dispersed once our training was over and we’ve never really had a reunion.  It was a wonderful time for me.   There have of course been other communities I’ve belonged to; my many years with the Narayever synagogue in Toronto, my Ministry community, my teaching communities (in various places around the world), my community of friends.  There is absolutely no doubt, though, that lack of feeling like part of a community lately has been plaguing me.  Community gives us direction in a way, and I’m missing that.  It’s like a compass – only I can’t find mine right now.

And that brings me back to my letter to you, the readers.

We are a community, at least in my mind we are.  There’s something that draws us together in thought at least; perhaps you’ve subscribed and automatically receive and get each week’s new posting, maybe you’re just dropping in for the first time but plan to be back, and maybe it’s one time through – glad you came.  At any rate, we are a sort of community of thought.   Thing is I haven’t gotten to know any of you – although you’re clearly getting to know me if you’re reading regularly.  And … you haven’t gotten to meet each other at all or know who the other “voices” commenting – or silent – are.  So here it comes.  I would really like this to be a more open community so I’m asking you to please do something for me.  Comment on this posting.  It doesn’t have to take long.  Just introduce yourself.  What’s your name (last name’s optional)?  How old are you (if you don’t mind sharing that … otherwise maybe just share what decade you’re in … I’m in my early 60’s myself)?  Where – or in what part of the world – do you live and/or do you come from?  A simple sentence on why you choose to read the blog … and that’s it.  You can write more of course if you’d like, but the idea is to just write enough to do a brief introduction of yourself to both me and the other members of the forthefirstime.ca community.

While you’re at it, last week I asked folks to send me one thing they complain about.  It just amazes me that with all of the people reading the blog only one of you has anything to complain about.  How great is that?    Did you just forget to share your complaints?  I’d still really like to get them, so if you could take just another minute and send along your main complaint these days … and forward last week’s post to anyone else you know who might have a complaint to lodge.  Thanks.

Well, like all letters this one has reached it’s end.  Next week I’ll share my incredible Carole King/James Taylor experience.  Hope to hear from you all this week.

B’shalom / In peace,

Sylvia